Carol | November 1, 2011
The article linked below is very disturbing. What is worse is how the North American culture is being prepared for polygamy through mainstream television programming like TLC’s Sister Wives and Our America with Lisa Ling, etc.
Polygamy is so degrading to women and such a backward step after all the efforts to have women treated better. Where are the feminists? If you have ever watched Sister Wives you would see the underlying themes of jealousy and missing father syndrome. People enjoy watching entertaining ”reality” programs like that and as a result, polygamy becomes accepted as part of the cultural norm. Then who will stand up against Shariah Law?
‘Shariah Allows Polygamy’: Libyan Women Are ‘Unsettled’ by the Return of Polygamy
Carol | July 31, 2011
“Utopianism is terribly cruel because it expects the impossible from people. These expectations are not based on reality. They stand in opposition to the genuine human possibilities afforded by the realism of the Scripture. Utopianism can cause harm. In the home, in the man-woman relationship, nothing is more cruel than for the wife or husband to build up a false image in his or her mind and then demand that the husband or wife measure up to this false romanticism. Nothing smashes homes more than this. Such behavior is totally contrary to the Bible’s doctrine of sin. Even after redemption we are not perfect in this life. Utopianism is also harmful in the parent-child relationship. When a parent demands more from his child than the child is capable of giving, the parent destroys him as well as alienates him. If we demand, in any of our relationships, either perfection or nothing, we will get nothing.” Francis Schaeffer, No Little People
Thanks for the reminder, thatmom.
1: an imaginary and indefinitely remote place
2: often capitalized – a place of ideal perfection especially in laws, government, and social conditions
3: an impractical scheme for social improvement
I can see so many examples of “false romanticism” that cause unnecessary conflict. Concentrating on how things “should” be can cause great pain. Making oneself sick trying to change reality is futile.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
~ Reinhold Niebuhr
Carol | June 25, 2011
Quivering with Fear: A Review of ‘Quivering Daughters’
“Idolatry of religion. This is perhaps the subtlest form of all. As McFarland puts it, ‘As a perfectionist who read the Bible every day and clung to commands to be perfect, holy, and to sin not, I committed idolatry. … I missed the voice that said Come to Me. Rest. I thought my obedience was the standard, not the love of Christ.’”
Carol | February 6, 2011
Dads can keep the peace… by leaving childcare to mum
“Couples have a stronger relationship when the father spends more time playing with their child. But when he participates in care-giving – such as giving baths – parents undermine each other.”
I don’t know if that would be the case because I think most mothers would be thankful for any help.
On a related issue, controlling fathers is one area that disturbs me. I can’t tell you how many times I have witnessed the distress of women whose husbands lay down the law about parenting issues. It seems to happen without ANY research into the topic. They also don’t appear to have any spirituality behind their decisions either. Completely ignorant decisions are made by these men while they are exercising their power of control.
Women tell me that their husbands say, “No, you can’t homeschool.” “No, you can’t breastfeed past one.” “No, the baby can’t sleep with us.” “No, we must spank the children.” “No, the baby stays with a sitter.” “No, you have to work.” “No, this is my money, and that is your money.” “No, we are DEFINITELY vaccinating.” “No, let her cry.”
I have heard these things so often from mothers. It is so sad and so wrong. I can only beg the young women to muster the strength and courage BEFORE engagement. BEFORE children. It starts with not giving their bodies away for free (without a wedding band of commitment).
Carol | February 6, 2011
New Study: Morning-after pill causes rise in teenage STDs
“The plan not only has not reduced teen pregnancy rates, but has led to a rise in sexually transmitted diseases.”
“Professor Paton told the Telegraph, ‘We find that offering the morning-after pill free of charge didn’t have the intended effect of cutting teenage pregnancies but did have the unfortunate side of effect of increasing sexually transmitted infections.’”
“‘By focusing on sexually transmitted infections, it allows us to test whether there is an impact on sexual risk-taking, and that seems to be the implication. Almost certainly young people are having more unprotected sex,’ he added.”
“‘But now we have evidence showing that not only are such schemes failing to do any good, but they may in fact be doing harm,’ Wells said.”
In case you don’t know about Plan B, read here:
Lexicon: Pre-Implantation and Emergency Contraception
Does Monogamy Even Exist Anymore? Not For Young People
Carol | February 6, 2011
The secret to a happy married life? Never forgive your partner when they misbehave
“Forgiveness is more likely to tear a marriage apart than keep it together.”
“The findings, published in the Journal of Family Psychology, showed partners who got away with being moody, abusive or sarcastic to their spouses were much more likely to do it again.”
“Those that were rebuked or shunned were more inclined to curb their bad habits.”
“The results showed that forgiveness nearly doubled the chance of a husband or wife doing the same again the next day.”
“Dr McNulty said: ‘Spouses were almost twice as likely to report that their partners had behaved negatively on days after they had forgiven them than on days after they hadn’t.”
“‘There is one plausible explanation – forgiveness allows relatively negative partners to continue their negative behaviours, ultimately harming the relationship.’”
I assume the forgiveness means ignoring the behaviour and just forgetting about it. I wonder about rebuking or shunning and THEN forgiving.
Carol | January 23, 2011
The children who never see daddy: Tragedy of Britain’s fatherless families where one in five youngsters lose touch with a parent
“One in five children from a broken home loses touch with a parent within three years and never sees them again, it is revealed today.”
Carol | January 23, 2011
Nearly half of women wouldn’t bother with university if they had the chance again
“Nearly half of female graduates would not go to university if they had the chance again.”
“Young women seem to think university ‘a waste of time’.”
“One in seven women said they had been forced to postpone getting married because a wedding would be too expensive.”
“More than one in six admitted that financial constraints had made them postpone trying to start a family.”
What women REALLY want: To marry a rich man and stay at home with the children
“Most women still prefer to marry a man who earns more money than they do and would stay at home with their children if they could afford it, according to a survey published yesterday.”
“Despite years of equality campaigning and advances for women in the workplace, 64 per cent said they aspire to find a husband who brings home a larger pay packet than they do. None wanted to marry a man who earned less.”
“And 69 per cent said they would prefer to stay at home to look after their children if money were not an issue.”
What Your Brain Looks Like After 20 Years of Marriage
Carol | January 1, 2011
Schoolgirls should be told to have children between age of 20 and 35, says UK’s top maternity doctor
“The best age for a woman to have a baby is between 20 to 35.”
“He warned against the growing trend for women to have children later as they concentrate first on their careers, insisting it harmed fertility and would lead to conception problems…”
“In the same interview, Dr Falconer warned that mothers giving birth at night are being put at risk because junior doctors with lesser experience are on duty.”